..:: Kiddo’s Gonna Be OK ::..

So, Children’s wireless policy is insane.  I can’t connect to social networking sites, personal sites, or sites with questionable content.  So, Twitter and Facebook are out, but goddamnsonofabitch.com is A-OK.  Go figure.

Anyhoo, she’s doing as good as can be expected.  Her mouth had the hell sutured out of it, so she can’t swallow, move her tongue, cough, cry or breathe without any pain.  Three cheers for morphine and codine.  She’s in a fog, but unfortunately that’s what she needs at this point.

She’s been through the wringer today.  Very strong when we got here — didn’t fuss or cry when the strangers in blue started poking and prodding her in pre-op. She rolled with it, and I was proud.  Then she went off, got sliced, stretched and stitched, and she woke up with a look that I had after that lost weekend in Tijuana, and I was proud.

Then came the blood, spit and tears.

She took it all in stride.  She had every right to be scared… it’s not every day you get a uvula.  It’s not every day you can breathe like an average person. That you can swallow like an average person. And every breath and swallow hurt her more than I can imagine.  And the funny thing is, she didn’t seem to cry because she was in pain. She seemed annoyed by it. Like she was trying to think her way through it and rationalize it. I don’t think a nine-month old has ever been introspective, but mine was.

And I’m proud.  Sleep well, princess.  Daddy’s here at your side. You’ve earned your rest.

..:: @ The Inauguration Behind This Hat ::..

A great way to shake off some insomnia is looking at the unrealistically hi-def photo created at the innauguration.  It’s a composite image of 200+ 1,474 megapixel shots.  And holy crap, my Olympus is underpowered compared to this mofo.

Click here to check it out.  Word on the street is you can see Yo Yo Ma taking a picture with this iPhone.  Have at it.

Tip o’ the hat to SS for bringing it to my attention.

EDIT:  Found him

..:: I’ve Hit The End Of Facebook ::..

..:: Bring Me The Head of Eddie Edwards ::..

Shamelessly copy ‘n pasted from seacoastonline.com:

PORTSMOUTH — The state’s top liquor law enforcer suggests a one-drink-per-hour law is a better way to revise state law than a bill supported by a group of local restaurant and bar owners and workers.

The local group wants to add the phrase “knowingly serve” to the law concerning responsibility in serving alcohol to underage and intoxicated customers.

Eddie Edwards, the state liquor law enforcement chief, said the bar and restaurant owners have a legitimate point. But he offered an alternative he called a “safe harbor” law.

Edwards’ proposal says that operators can serve one drink per hour, four at a sitting. One drink is defined as 1 ounce of spirits, 5 ounces of wine or 12 ounces of beer.

“Here’s the criteria — you can only consume so much alcohol,” Edwards said. “If I give you four, five drinks an hour, you should know that this makes someone intoxicated.”

Holy shit, Batman, this guy wants to make my Manhattans illegal to serve.  Eddie… brother… settle the fuck down.  I know you feel like you’re all balls with a moniker of ‘top liquor law enforcer’, but this isn’t your fight.  If people drink too much and do something stupid, there are criminal statutes that come into play. What if I have a designated driver, shit, how about two lined up in pilot and copilot formation in case one becomes incapacitated and I want to drink my ass off.  Like drink-until-the-octomom-is-hot-drunk. I wouldn’t be able to drink more than one drink an hour?  Eff that.

“… you should know that this makes someone intoxicated.”  No shit, Sherlock.  You know what makes me drink, Eddie?  Stupid people in positions to do stupid things. You make me want to drink. And if you get your way, I won’t be able to act on my nature because of your dumbass idea.

It’s New Hampshire, Eddie.  Live Free or Die.  And you ain’t gonna change that.

..:: One For The Geeks – My 5 OS Laptop ::..

So, I managed to turn my laptop test rig dubbed Riceburner (because it took a water spill and I dried it out with some minute rice), into a five OS booting powerhouse. This is one mad multi boot and was done as a demonstration, as there’s no funding for me to have an actual training budget here. Here’s what I did:

I used the Kalyway 10.5.2 install disc to partition my HD.
Windows (0,0) – 60GB
Ubuntu (0,1) – 30GB
Leopard (0,2) – 30GB
Vista (0,3) – 15GB
Win7 (0,4) – 15GB
Total HD space: 150GB

Installed Windows Media Center Edition in the first partition – Windows. Then upgraded to Vista in the fourth, and added in Windows 7 (I’ll do a few more rearms to keep it up for bragging rights, but turn it over to transfer and Linux swap space afterwards.)

I installed Ubuntu in the second partition, tested it out with Super GRUB, then moved onto Leopard by way of Kalyway.

Everything was smooth until Leopard fucked my shit up, but I followed the how to fix display errors step in the user agreement and after swallowing my pride, it worked like a charm. I don’t have a fully supported chipset, as Riceburner is a Tecra A9, so I’m not able to connect it to a network, but everything else is solid under Leopard.

And the best part of it is, my conscience is clean in terms of licensing and EULA. Every install is covered by not being installed on other equipment in my possession. (Even have an Apple sticker on the top of Riceburner if Apple gets persnickety about Apple labeled items.)

A great resource from a dude in Indonesia worked for me: http://linux-guider.blogspot.com/2008/09/dual-boot-linux-and-mac-osx-leopard.html. It’s pidgin English, but the Linux is clean and worked like a charm.

I do have a bit of a two-step boot process though – GRUB starts, and for the Windows partitions it references the MBR loader.

Next, I’m off to tackle the loaves and fishes and water into wine thing.

..:: Write The President A Farewell Note ::..

Fat, festering boil Karl Rove is soliciting letters of thanks and congratulations for George W Bush as he packs up the china and turns off the light in the Oval Office one last time.  You can send letters to gwbfarewell@gmail.com by 6PM on Monday and Rove will deliver them to Bush.  Kind of a nice way to give him a proper send off.

Here’s my letter.

To:  gwbfarewell@gmail.com
From: brad@gdsob.com
Subject:  Thank you for your service, Mr. President

You managed to outrun the Curse of Tecumseh and the Earth did not crash into the sun on your watch.  I’d call that a successful term in office.

Crack open a beer and put your feet up. You deserve it.
– Brad

..:: Brad’s Facebook Friend Census – Results ::..

It took some time to compile, but I got yer results right here.  When I looked back this morning,  I lost a friend along the way, and my count as it stands right now at 199.  So, it’s not REALLY accurate, and was this gonna be scientific anyways?  I wasn’t wearing a lab coat, and had Erlenmeyer flasks bubbling over a Bunsen burner or anything.

Without any further adieu, here is my quantitative breakout of Facebook friends:

Total: 200
Male:  95 (47.5%)
Female: 105 (52.5%)

Friends I’ve worked with:  38 (19%)
Current coworkers:  12 (6%)
Former coworkers: 24 (12%)
Vendors/suppliers: 2 (1%)

Friends I know from school:  126 (63%)
Bentley College:  69 (34.5%)
Pinkerton Academy: 34 (17%)
Hood Jr. High:  11 (5.5%)
South Range Elementary:  10 (5%)
Nutfield Preschool/Kindergarten:  2 (1%)

Friends I’ve smoked with:  3 (1.5%)
Friends I’ve drank with:  101 (50.5%)
Friends I’ve seen in their underwear:  12 (6%)
Friends I’ve drank with in their underwear:  4 (2%)
Friends I’ve skied with:  21 (10.5%)
Friends I’ve hugged:  28 (14%)
Friends I’ve hugged while skiing:  0 (0%)
Friends met on the internet:  15 (7.5%)
Friends I’ve never actually met:  10 (5%)
Friends I’ve only seen once:  3 (1.5%)
Friends whose voices I have not heard in 10 years or more:  68 (34%)
Friends I’ve slept with:  28 (14%)
Friends with whom I have some kind of regret:  5 (2.5%)
Friends who have run over my foot:  3 (1.5%)
Friends who have run over my foot more than once: 1 (.5%, but 33% of the above)
Friends whose mom has bossed me around at some point: 4 (2%)
Friends I’ve made a border crossing with: 2 (1%)
Friends whose toothbrush I have used by accident: 2 (1%)
Friends who have heard the Croatian hermaphrodite story:  10 (5%)
Friends who are the mother of another friend:  3 (1.5%)
Friends who I thought I heard the last of until Facebook came around: 12 (6%)
Friends I only know through SWMBO:  5 (2.5%)
Friends who have put up with my shit in some form:  200 (100%)
Friends who have farted in front of me:  6 (3%)
Friends who know another friend in an inexplicable way: 4 (2%)
Friends in my freshman seminar class with me: 3 (1.5%)
Friends I’ve gone to the mall with: 6 (3%)

..:: Brad’s Facebook Friend Census Is Coming Soon! ::..

I’m holding tight at 198 Facebook friends, and as soon as I hit 200, I’m gonna publish the census I’ve been working on.  I chose 200 because, well, it’s the nearest milestone kinda number that I can easily calculate percentages from.  And saying that I’ve smoked a cigarette with 1.5% of my Facebook friends sounds better than having to round up to 2%.

Look for fun categories like the number of Facebook friends I usually see on Christmas Eve, know only from the internet or have seen in their underwear.  Totally quantitative findings, not spilling any beans about who I know from where or whatever.  It’ll be fun, and when I hit 200 I’ll publish it.

..:: When Did Jerry Bruckheimer Grow A Vagina? ::..

CBS owes him a lot.  If he didn’t do the CSI’s, Without A Trace, The Amazing Race, and Eleventh Hour, they’d be running a distant fifth behind The CW.  Everything the man touches turns to gold.

Let’s look at his movie resume.  Top Gun, the first two Beverly Hills Cop movies, Bad Boys 1 & 2, the three Pirates of the Caribbean movies, Crimson Tide, Con Air, The Rock and more.  All of them kick ass movies with ’splosions or memorable performances.  I’m intentionally omitting Pearl Harbor because of the Affleck factor.  And the fact that his character took a train to England.

Why in fuck’s name is he behind Confessions of a Shopaholic?  Unless Isla Fisher has to stop a terrorist plot armed with an MP5 and a pair of Manolo’s, he’s lost his street cred with me.

..:: An Open Letter To The Asshole In Front Of Me ::..

Dear sir/madam:

You drive a short little sedan. Don’t be a lazy prick and CLEAN THE ICY BUILDUP OFF YOUR ROOF.

Yeah, I know, your cousin fucking mother left you with webbed fingers at the end of your stubby T-rex-like arms when she went out for a carton of smokes and never returned. Life’s tough enough for you as it is. Don’t drag those of us driving behind you down with you. I’ve got enough on my plate as it is, but dodging tumbling airborne ice sheets that look like the damn phantom zone with Zod, Ursula and the dude who looks like Bull from Night Court with a beard while reaching for a pacifier in the back seat is unacceptable.

I can forgive a little old lady in a van, or an SUV with a roof rack, but c’mon. You’re an inconsiderate douche.

Drive into a bridge abutment and remove yourself from the gene pool.

Hugs and kisses!
– Brad